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Archive for the ‘Poems’ Category

Apathy …?

Apathy … why? Is it too painful to feel?

Would releasing that anger be such a big deal?

If you cried all those tears and then cried a bit more,

would that make you feel better or leave you feeling raw?

 

What’s the worst that could happen when you’re facing the pain?

Just a whole lot of truth that you’re facing again.

Yes it hurts and it pains but at least it is real,

no good lying to yourself, not allowing to feel.

 

And when all’s said and done and you release the pain

and your left feeling empty, just remember his name,

only Jesus can help you, believe me, this is true

he will carry you and your pain as he helps you through.

 

 

Please help me through Lord Jesus!

Amen!

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Trust and see!

I wish you could know him

for he knows all about you,

to experience his love in your heart

and be filled with joy right through.

To have the emptiness filled

and the loneliness disappear,

as you realise your Saviour,

Jesus Christ is near.

 

 

To have fears washed away

and his peace dwell within,

to become aware of God

and realise that we sin.

To have the revelation

of what he has done ,

for you he sent

his only begotten Son.

 

 

He loves you that much

that he forgives all your sin

but how can he save you

if you don’t believe in him?

Don’t send yourself to hell,

just have a little faith,

believe and you will see

and he will keep you safe!

 

 

Don’t close your mind and heart

just because you cannot see,

not everything in life

is visible to you and me.

It’s only when you trust

that God is really there

that he can show how much

he really does care.

 

 

So think about our God

who created us all,

His magnificence, His power,

loving us who are so small.

And see yourself for who you are,

through God the truth be known,

Jesus represents God, in man,

he wants to lead you home.

 

 

God is love, God is peace,

God is truth, God is just,

God is good, God is real,

you can know him – just trust!

 

 

by MandeeJ

 

 

Relevant verses:

“For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him.” (John 3:16-17)

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My body aches, my bones are old,

I can’t do things alone,

I need someone to help me now;

When will you bring me home?

 

My loved ones have all gone now,

so here i wait for you,

and strangers visit day and night,

to do things i can’t do.

 

I try to hold my head up

and walk without support

but someone has to help me;

and then i have this thought.

 

You also felt this tired

when you carried the cross

you wanted to go home too

and felt this sense of loss.

 

When Simon helped you carry

that cross to where you died

how did you feel to need such help?

Did you feel sad inside?

 

Lord Jesus you know how i feel

to have this sense of shame

when will you bring me home, my Lord

so i can dance again?

 

My eyes are very poorly,

my ears they strain to hear

when you was fighting for your breath

was there a hint of fear?

 

So though i feel so weary

and want to rest with you

i know you know just how i feel

for you walked this road too.

 

When will you bring me home Lord?

When will you set me free

for i can’t take much more of this

your face i long to see.

 

by MandeeJ

(For a dear friend of mine.)

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Don’t Hide, Be True!

I play the hiding game again

and mask the way i feel

for being true is hard to do

when the pain is oh so real!

 

I try to hide the loneliness,

this longing deep inside,

you tell me you will comfort me,

in you i must confide.

 

I share my inmost fears with you,

my yearning desires too,

you listen so attentively

and tell me what to do.

 

As you reveal the truth to me

of how i hide from others

you also bring me healing

saying i should tell my brothers.

 

For fellowship is helpful

in seeing self more clearly

when feedback is received from those

who know and love you dearly.

 

And healing comes more quickly

when first we do confess

as we free up from guilt and shame

and all that brings us stress.

 

And as i start to open up

and share my heart with them,

i feel your loving presence

wrapping me in love again.

 

I will depend on you alone

to comfort and guide me,

by being true and trusting you

the truth will set me free.

 

by MandeeJ

 

Relevant verses:  The Holy Bible (NIV)

“Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” (John 8:32)

“Therefore confess your sins to each other so that you may be healed.” (James 5:16)

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Fill this heart again!

You looked into my heart

and poured your love within,

no-one has ever gone that deep

or seen what lies within.

 

Convictions they were numerous,

I welcomed them and learned

that your thoughts are much higher

and your love cannot be earned.

 

Compassion you have shown me,

a tenderness so sweet,

a gentle, understanding God

who bends to wash my feet.

 

You listen with attentiveness,

you know my every need

accepting me for who i am

despite my selfish greed.

 

I’ve watched you work and i have seen

how preciously you love 

a wise yet humble servant,

Creator from above.

 

But lately i can’t see you,

a veil covers my eyes,

your words a gentle whisper

now mingled in with lies.

 

And where’s the burning passion

that i once had for you,

the fiery love, i felt inside,

when you made me brand new?

 

A clouded, distant memory

of love that felt so strong,

I’m scared you’re fading from my heart,

please tell me what went wrong?

 

If you fade from this very life

then death is all i see

for i am nothing without you

Oh Lord, please hear my plea!

 

Has my heart become hardened,

are you so hard to find,

are you still here within my heart

and speaking to my mind?

 

Please turn my heart and draw me near,

open this mind again,

bring revelation, faith, hope, love

and healing from this pain.

 

You are the meaning in my life

there’s nothing i need more,

Jesus come fill this heart again,

you’re all i’m living for!

 

by MandeeJ

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Satisfy me!

I’m hungry, so hungry,

i’m empty inside,

depression has set in,

i just want to hide. 

This void deep within me

is filled once again,

i’m numb, without feeling

yet bursting with pain.

 

I’m eating, i’m drinking

i’m smoking, i’m fed,

just trying to stuff down

this noise in my head.

 What else can i turn to

to satisfy me,

some shopping, more drinking

or cake and some tea?

 

I’m lonely, i’m empty

 who can i go see?

There must be someone

who can satisfy me.

 More wine, more sex,

more food, friends and fun,

oh my head is hurting

best have another one.

 

Where will it all end up?

What can i try now?

I’ll find something else,

make me feel good somehow.

 A new car, a big house,

more money, more pleasure,

oh i can live life to the full,

at my leisure.

 

But what does it all mean?

Where does it all go?

How long will it last?

I really don’t know.

 It’s all meaningless, see

nothing will satisfy

these quick fixes, all gone

in the blink of an eye.

 

The only everlasting

joy that i do find

is in Jesus Christ,

eternal love, so kind.

 There is nothing on earth

that fills the emptiness

only God who loves me

despite my selfishness.

 

While i’m trying to fill

the void that’s within me

he says “come here my child

and i’ll set you free.”

 He says “you are unable

to fill that void within,

see i made you to seek me

who forgives all your sin.”

 

“I can take all the pain,

all the hurt, all your tears

and give you a new life,

strip away all your fears.

“For i’m your only hope,

only i can fill you,

turn to Jesus the Saviour

and see what i’ve done for you.”

 

by MandeeJ

Relevant verses: Psalm 107:7-9

“for he satisfies the thirsty and fills the hungry with good things.” (Psa. 107:9)

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and so i fall again …

It was all going well,

I was flying on high,

over mountain-tops,

soaring the wonderous sky.

 

But when flying that high

we can forget the fall,

the great danger that faces

the proud who stand tall.

 

We think we can see clearly

as we’re above all

when we’re flying that high,

when we’re standing that tall.

 

So i flew on the currents

of warm, secure air,

I was sure you were with me,

i felt brave, without fear.

 

Then the temptation hit me

as emotions did grow

I felt good, i was confident

why not give it a go?

 

So i reasoned, i argued

I won my case fair,

i can soar so much higher

if i just go up there.

 

So the lie was conceived

and the truth put aside

and i soared, and i swooped

and i enjoyed the ride.

 

Then i fell into a dive

and my heart did break so

when i realised that that

was not the way to go.

 

Oh how foolish i’d been

to think i would know best

all that reasoning i’d done

for my own selfishness.

 

If i’d just waited for you

to lift me on high

i would not be falling

from your wonderous sky.

 

Then as suddenly as i fell

with my heart full of pain

you do catch me and lift me

to soar with you again.

 

So i’ll patiently wait

for you to lift me

as you show me the truth

as you help me to fly free.

 

MandeeJ

Relevant verses: James 1:14-15 &

(Deut. 32:11-12) “like an eagle that stirs up its nest and hovers over its young, that spreads its wings to catch them and carries them on its pinions. The Lord alone led him;”

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